Alaala ni Batman

I was supposed to write something about my re-entry to the working community, but then nakita ko ang video ng Alaala ni Batman ng Radioactive Sago Project. At naisip ko, "'Langhya, andito na naman ang Sago...nagpapaka-astig!" Talaga namang nahumaling akong muli. Ito, lyrics...ibang level...bowdown talaga ako sa Sago...

Alaala ni Batman

Radioactive Sago Project

Ano ba yun....

Bale, 1986 nung una kong nakilala si Batman. Wala pang ABS-CBN nun. Sa BBC2 pa nun eh, panahon ni Marcos na malapit nang mamatay. Wala rin si Kris Aquino, wala pa si Boy Abunda. Sikat pa si German Moreno nun eh. Sabi ko, "Shit! Ang galing nito ah." Natulala ako nang una kong napanood si Batman. "Shit! Ang galing nito," sabi ko sa sarili ko. "Ang galing galing galing galing ng itsura ni Batman. Parang kinatam ang mukha. Ang galing ng costume. Umuumbok ang dibdib pero hindi pa rin bakat ang utong. At, ang galing ng gadgets niya, ang gara ng kotse, ang ganda ng bahay, ang galing-galing mag-Ingles, ang galing mangarate. Actually, pulbos nga lahat ng kalaban niya eh.Palagi ko siyang pinapanood nang tuwing hapon. Palagi akong nakikipag-away sa katulong namin dahil gusto niyang manood ng Lotlot and Friends at saka That's Entertainment. Pero ako, isa lang talaga ang gusto kong panoorin -- siya ring na idol na idol na idol na idol ko talaga (Idooool!).

Bale, idol na idol na idol na idol na idol ko talaga si Batman. Di bale na si Robin. Ayoko si Robin kasi parang bading. Ano kaya ang relasyon nila ni Batman? Pero, idol ko talaga si Batman nun. Palagi ko siyang dinodrawing. Palagi ko siyang ginagaya. Lahat ng mga bagay na Batman gustong-gusto ko at meron ako. Yung t-shirt ko Batman. Yung lunch box ko, Batman. Yung pencil case ko, yung panyo, sumbrero, yung toothbrush, yung brief ko, lahat yun Batman. Mahal na mahal ako ng tatay ko kasi kahit mahirap lang kami palagi niya akong binibili ng mga Batman na bagay. Pero minsan, gusto ko talaga ngBatmobile na laruan. Nagpabili ako sa kanya, sabi ko "Tay, bili mo naman ako ng batmobile o." Pero, kakadaing lang niya sa trabaho nun, at wala daw siyang pera. Kasi kasali yata sa unyon, at wala siyang ticket line kaya yun, natanggal. Kaya gumawa na lang siya ng tarak-tarak na lata ng sardinas at binutasan na lang at kinabitan ng tansan at dun ko nalaman ang ibig sabihin ng pagmamahal.

At paglumipas na ang mga taon na si Batman ay tuluyan nang naglaho mula sa aking alaala. Ngunit sa isang madilim na sulok ng aking kamalayan, alam kong naroon pa rin si Batman - isang tahimik na aninong nakabalabal sa dilim at misteryo sa loob ng aking utak at kwarto. At mula noon ay nag-iba na nga ang ihip ng hangin, nagulo na ang ikot ng mundo, kumupas na ang kulay ng buhay, dumaan ang mgakasintahan, ang mga asawa, ang mga taong akala mo'y kaibigan pero yun pala'y tarantado, mga artistang araw-araw napapanood sa TV na mga bobo, mga pulitikong bobo, mga trabahong maliit lang ang suweldo, isang milyong limpak na mga problema, isang bahada ng mgahinanakit sa mundong hinagpis. Hindi ko na matagalan. Hindi ko na matiis. Hindi ko na kaya.

Ngayon, hindi ko na talaga kaya! Hindi ko na talaga kaya! Hindi ko na kaya! May narinig akong putok na nasa kaibuturan ng aking utak. Bumigay na ang tali! Sumabog na ang bulkan! Nabasag na ang pula! Kaya ngayon, isang madilim na madilim na gabi, ako ay narito na sa tuktok ng isang mataas na mataas na building sa Ayala. Ang sarap ng hangin na umihip-ihip sa aking kapa. Nakataas ang aking mga kamay! Nakataas na ang aking mga kamay! Malapit na akong lumipad! Malapit na akong lumipad! Malapit na akong lumipad! Lipad, Batman, lipad! Lumipad ka! Lumipad ka! Lumipad ka papuntang langit! Lumipad ka! Lumipad ka! Nakataas ang aking mga kamay, nakataas na ang aking mga kamay!

Eh pero, bigla kong naisip hindi naman pala lumilipad si Batman, 'di ba? Hindi naman pala lumilipad si Batman. Hindi naman pala lumilipad si Batman. Kaya paalam, malupit na mundo. Paalam, mahal. Paalam po, inay, itay, kuya, ate, lolo, lola, paalam po. Lolo sa tuhod, paalam po. Lola sa siko, paalam po. Bantay, paalam. Muning, paalam. Ewan ko kung sinong magpapakain sa inyo. Paalam po, Aling Tekla. Paalam po, Mang Gorio. At saka ko na lang po babayaran yung sukang inutang ko sa inyo. Paalam, Jun-jun. Paalam, Bong-bong, Ba-bye Rose, Hoy! Ba-bye, Ba-bye, Baby. Ba-bye, Pablo....

para sa'yo...

Mahal kita...'yun lang.

Panahon Ng Pag-Ibig

Let's celebrate love.

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I found the almost perfect guy. He's cute. And has the nicest body ever (my God, I so love looking at his broad shoulders and touching his hard biceps). So smart. And talented. He plays a mean guitar and has the smoothest voice. The problem is...HE'S MY COUSIN!!! And everytime I'd look at him I have to remind myself over and over and over again that "HAILIE NO!!!! KASALANANG MALUPIT!!!"

Sana may me-meet pa akong tulad niya...at sana this time around hindi ko na siya pinsan. Wahaha!!!

* * * *

Current love status: Still single but really happy. Someone's keeping a smile on my face thse days (and thank God he's not my cousin). ^__^

NEW POST!!!

I'M IT (tagged by Annabs)

*CAUTION: Extreme cheesiness ahead.*

GENDER: A he.

1. Someone who's going to make me laugh really, really hard...'yung tipong lumabas na 'yung ngala-ngala ko sa kakatawa.

2. Someone's who's gonna think I'm still cute even with my ngala-ngala out.

3. Someone I can talk to...tipong we'll be debating about anything and anything without necessarily arguing.

4. Someone I can be quiet with...we can not talk for hours yet still know what the other person is thinking.

5. Street smart. Not necessarily book intelligent...basta itapon mo siya sa kahit saan and he'll know how to survive.

6. Someone whom I'll feel safe with...'yung mere presence niya will make me feel as if nothing can touch me...

7. A really sweet boy hiding behind a bad boy attitude.

8. Someone who can surprise me even 3 years down the line.

* * * *

Hehe...I've been wanting to do this for a long time now. And I still can't believe I'm posting a new entry. Haha!

Anyways, I'm currently in Bicol. We celebrated our great grandma's 88th birthday last Saturday. We were so excited when we were told that we'll be going to Bicol. But the excitement ended on the bus trip. Because the moment we arrived here, we were put ynder my lola's iron hands. My God...it's like second coming of Martial Law!!! We can't even go the nearest sari-sari store without telling her. It's suffocating. Case in point: It's already 12:oomn. We were all gathered at my lola-sa-tuhod's place. All the matatanda were having fun drinking Fundador (or is it Emperador?) and we (my cousin and I) were already sleepy. So we made our goodbyes. And guess what she told us? "Saan kayo pupunta? Baka kung saan-saan pa kayo gumala, ha. Diretso na sa bahay." And I wanted to answer, "Hello? Sa ganitong oras saan kami pupunta? And as if naman may pupuntahan kami dito 'no? Puro talahiban ang nasa paligid!!!" And just now, we set a date with our COUSIN so he can take us pasalubong shopping before we leave for Manila tomorrow. At muntik kaming hindi payagan! Kasi daw baka may mga kabarkadang lalaki 'yung pinsan namin na sumabit sa lakad. Waaah...can a girl get pregnant by a mere handshake? Hindi naman 'di ba? Honestly, I'm so glad I'll be back in Manila tomorrow...

* * * *

Belated HAPPY SINGLES' AWARENESS DAY to all happy people like me!

Speking of Valentine's 2006, I just have to say it was such a memorable one. Haha! Since we were bored to death, we decided to watch what was advertised as a "Valentine Show and Celebrity Launch" featuring Emil of Viva Records, Anna Meyer, and the hot, hot, hot ( I swear this was how they were introduced...always) Danztruck. Who the hell were these guys? We alsohad no idea. But what the heck, we decided to be jologs all we want. And buti na lang 'yung Php20 na admission fee ay hindi nanggaling sa sarilikong bulsa kung hindi, napalupasaya ako sa asar. It sucked! The program sucked. The host sucked. The singers and their voices sucked. The Danztrick were...you guessed it, sucked. But at least, hindi kami nagmukmok sa bahay! And honestly, memorable 'tong Valentines na 'to for its mere KAJOLOGAN! Hehe.

FINALLY...I am Back!!!

Long hiatus from the blogging world.

Gawd...I can't believe how much I missed my blog! Been wanting to change the skin. This one is just so...sad. And so, passe. I'm not feeling *depressed* anymore. Aargh...it's so mushy. Mushy! But alas, I still haven't got time to update skin. But I'm sooo itching to post a new entry.

Anyways, updates...

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Office matters. I'm quitting my job by December 30. For a lot of reasons. The biggest of which is the fact that I'm totally bored with it already. I feel that I'm d.r.a.g.g.i.n.g. myself everytime I have to go to work. Gone are the days when I wake up and go, "Hey! Another work day! Aja!!!" Now I'm just, "Work? Again?! NOOOO!!!" And I don't feel good about it. Because it's not just the boredom. It's also because I started to question why I have to work. And the only answer I can come up with is, "Because of the money." But money is not all that counts in a job. I keep on looking for the *purpose* of why I have to slave over them f-cking customers. At the end of the day, I feel drained. And I long the sense of feeling fulfilled everytime I rest my tired eyes to sleep. And thus, the decision to resign...

But believe me, it was easy. For my part. But everytime I think of my sister and my brother and my mom and the expenses that lie ahead, I feel my resolve crumbling to pieces. But I have to do this for myself. I don't want to get caught up in a situation where I always feel that I'm in the losing end. Because if I don't leave the job now, I know I'll regret it in the future.

Besides, I've decided that it's high time to finish my thesis...

@ @ @ @

Yes, thesis. I've finally realized that hey...KAILANGAN TAPUSIN KO NA ANG THESIS KO!!! Good for me...pat in the back. Haha!

When I started to go solo for the thesis I had Eminem in my mind as the topic for my college research. Creation of an idol. That was how I wanted to attack it. But somehow, the idea was floating. I was never sure of when and where to start the study.

But now I've decided on a topic. A topic also dear to my heart. And a topic I was deadset on pinning for my thesis. Korean dramas. Haha! I'll keep mum about this muna. I don't wanna jinx it. Wish me luck!

@ @ @ @

Speaking of Koreans. I got hired as an English teacher for Koreans last week. I submitted my resume and toom the long yet easy (puwera pagyayabang!) exam last November 16. Then I was scheduled for interview last November 21. They accepted me right then and there! I was pleased becase (caution: major gloating coming ahead) the Korean bosses told me that they only accept college graduates but they made an axception for me...I was, as they put it, a "special cse" because I got the highest score among the new hires. ANd so I started training the next day - deadset on keeping two jobs for the next month.

But I failed.

Because on the second day of training, I was informed that I needed to cover 8a.m. to 12nn classes...which will totally clash with my call center work. And I can't just quit the call center. I had to render a 30-day notice. Bummer! I really wanted the job. Not needed. Wanted. And I was so sad to have to give it up. But I'll be back once my thesis is complete.

Sigh.

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"It's called CLOSURE. That's what I'm looking for with him. It's hard when you've considered someone as special. Then one day you realize, he doesn't want you in his life anymore. And no matter what you do he's never gonna let you in again. And you can't help but wonder, 'Why?' And you can't move on, no matter how hard you try...because that question always, ALWAYS, pulls you back."

A text message to a friend at around 3p.m., November 25. It was nothing. Just a thought trigerred by an irrational longing for Charles. yes...Charles. It's just that recently, I seem to be missing him more and more. And I know that I'm wandering a one-way street yet again.

And maybe it's not him. Maybe it's that occasional need to feel loved.

I need to be loved.

@ @ @ @

Anyway, let's leave the drama behind and go to that fun event that happened which was, ironically, brought about by that super-senti text message.

Finally managed to meet up with Mae Anne for coffee. Starbucks ABS-CBN, same day, 8p.m. Naknam----! Nagpi-pink na si Marie Ann! Haha! I missed that girl. Everything - yes, including the nonsensical irrational though regarding Charles - makes sense when I talk to her. It's like - borrowing a line from Abi Aquino's Drama Queen - I was reading a book in hte dark then she walks in, turns on the light, and I realize, "Hey, why didn't I think of that?" Hay naku Marie Ann...hindi ka na puwede mawala sa buhay ko! *** charing ***

Also, we got to discuss our plans of setting-up our own business in the future: we're going to be wedding planners! We're both excited. We've had this dream since last year. And I can't wait. Research, research...I'll keep my lips sealed muna about the business' hook. Somebody just might steal it. Haha!

@ @ @ @

BTW, speaking of missing friends...I miss Val! So much! Realized this on the same night I met with Mae Anne...Val joined us at around 10p.m. As I've told Mae Anne, I love Val so much because she's so damn mature, and composed. When she gives me an advice, I just have to believe her! Hehe!

So Val, when our next 'one beer'? =p

@ @ @ @

Going to another chika...

I have this huge crush on an officemate. I had a crush on him fo err, 6months? But it was just frou-frou. But I think I'm starting to really like him. But...uhm...

'Nuff said.